Friday, October 6, 2006

A side of tongue -- jcarolek

Today I went to lunch with a friend. We spoke of the weather (lots of rain, wind and general blustery commotion), the pond (lacking water since the dam broke, rebuilding, etc.) and family. We meet a couple of times a week for lunch and it is always nice.

Today, as always, the food was excellent.

I was nearly finished with my Main Street Steak Salad when it happened. An errant move of my tongue, positioned it directly in the cross hairs of my already closing teeth.


As I was raised to always “mind my manners,” I did not shriek out in pain. I did not spit my half chewed food back on my plate. I did not cry or leap up from my chair. As befitting my lot in life, I suffered in silence. Mouth closed, hardly daring to swallow, I sat, numbed by the pain. My friend, noting the lull in my otherwise brilliant conversation, asked what was wrong. Again, fearing the loss of control, should I attempt to verbalize my dental collision, I simply pointed to my clenched mouth and conveyed the pain with my eyes. She got it, and winced….whew, that sort of felt good…share the PAIN!!!

My moment of paralysis passed and my automatic processing of the remainder of my salad proceeded, without further incident. Once my salad was consumed, I started in on their specialty...a nice thick slice of zucchini bread. Mmmm…it was good.

Our conversation continued as we moved on to topics worthy of our two cents…politics, interest rates…you know the stuff. On about bite number three of the thick hunk of specialty, my once again errant tongue sought out my teeth for a repeat encounter!

OUCH!!! OUCH!! And double OUCH!!!

OK, the message was clear….I was done eating for this meal! I wrapped the remainder of the zucchini bread in napkins for “later”, we said our goodbyes and I headed back home.

Sometime between conference calls, I was feeling a little hungry and decided to finish off the last of Momnyou’s fudge. It positively melts in my mouth…and yet….GEEZ LOUISE!!! Not again!!!! Yes, dear friends. It would appear that today’s menu “special” was,


As I sit and write this sad tale, my tongue is severely swollen on the right side, my throat is sore from the “healing” lymph nodes kicking in, and it hurts to swallow. If I hadn’t been through this at least a thousand times in my 48 years of dining, I might be worried...instead, I wonder…what percentage of my tongue is now scar tissue????

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